Nightmares with Alice-DSL

At our current address we have internet via cable, 16Mbps download, 1Mbps upload, 29 euro flatrate. Works perfectly. The thing is, KabelBW (the only cable company in this land) are not present at our new address. They are at the next house, but not at ours. Which means they will most likely make us pay a LOT for the connection. Anyway, I am still waiting for an answer from them.

In the meantime though, we need temporary internet access. Everybody in the house is a heavy internet user so we can’t do without. I ended up deciding to go with Alice-DSL since they don’t force you in a 24-months contract, you can cancel every month. So I go to their website, I choose one of the tariff plans and I start filling out the formular. Only to discover it’s not working in Firefox. Damn it :evil: Ok, I fire up Internet Explorer, everything goes ok and at the end I tell them I want the service to be activated on the 5th of December, there is an option for that.

A few days later I get couple of phone calls from hidden numbers. As I was in a meeting, I ignored them, of course. After a while I realize it may be the guys from Alice-DSL so I plan to answer the next one. I still don’t understand why are they hiding their phone number ? And since they called anyway, why don’t they leave a voicemail ?

Anyway, it turns out it was a guy from Alice-DSL afterall. We’ll call him Idiot1. Idiot1 starts and asks me all kind of questions which I have already answered in their online formular. I try not to get annoyed and I answer the dude. Until he tells me the service will be activated as soon as possible. I reply that no, that is wrong, the service should be activated on the 5th of December, as I told them in the online thingy. I ask him why doesn’t he look over that data but Idiot1 starts to babble and tells me that he will correct it (correct what ?!) and that 5th of December is ok.

2 days later I get an confirmation SMS which says everything is ok and the service will be activated on 10th of December. WTF ?! I look up their last email, see a contact link, I get from there the hotline number (free call) and I ring them up. Their stupid system make me input my new phone number before they connect me. Of course I don’t have yet anything like that, this is a new connection. Another automated message tells of another hotline number that I can call, if I don’t have a number. So I call that (not free anymore, of course). I talk with a lady, we’ll call her Idiot2. I try to explain that I spoke with someone else from the hotline for 5th of December but she has no idea what I am talking about. Since 10th of December is not good for me, we set it up for 15th of December.

Yesterday the nightmare begins. I get another confirmation email, with the contract attached, which states that on 10th of December my service will be activated and that the Telekom dude will arrive sometime between 8:00 and 16:00h! I start to get really annoyed. The email comes from a generic address, some like info@bla.bla , so I reply and explain that the date is wrong, correct is 15th of December and that I need a certain time, I can’t wait the whole day for the guy. I get a reply from Idiot3 ([name removed]) which confirms the 15th of December and also slaps some copy/paste shit with all kind of info about the Telekom guy, how they have no control over his schedule, that I have to be home between 8:00h and 16:00h, etc. She also informs me that if the guy comes and I am not there, next time they will charge me with 50 Euros.

I answer that it’s completely absurd, I live in another city, the house is empty and I drive there especially for this appointment. I can’t waste all day, without going to eat and so on, waiting like an idiot. I ask them to talk to the people at Telekom, to give them my mobile number and have the technician call me before he arrices. How hard can it be ? I get an answer from Idiot4 ([name removed]). She just tells me that they can’t get in touch with the guy. I answer that I don’t care about that, they should get in touch with someone who can contact the guy.

I get another answer from Idiot5 ([name removed]) who tells me that it’s not possible and then slaps the same copy/paste crap. I get pissed, I reply that I am sick and tired of theyr copy/paste useless information and that if they don’t deal with this, I am canceling the contract and look somewhere else for internet. Finally, another lady replies, she appologizes and tells me that they will give my number to the Telekom guy (aha, so it CAN be done!) but she can’t guarantee that he will call me. Ok, I find that resonable so I answer and thank her for the first helpful email. Only to get another reply from Idiot6 ([name removed]) who gives me again some copy/paste totally unrelated to my email. She didn’t even bother to read it.

I just sent them an email which says that if the guy does not show up on the 15th, or if he shows up without calling, I am canceling the contract because I had enough of their incompetent hotline people.


5 Responses to “Nightmares with Alice-DSL”

  1. Dany says:


    Sunt EXTREM de familiar cu epopeele support-ului de la Alice. Am pierdut de mult socoteala sirului nemarginit de DobitocN/DobitoacaN cu care am avut de-a face. In fiecare noapte inainte de culcare multumesc cosmosului ca a tinut entropia departe de conexiunea mea si m-a scutit de un nou apel la suportul Alice!

  2. Stefan says:

    Mda, din ce am mai citit se pare ca au cei mai multi incompetenti si cretini la support. D’aia prefer sa platesc mai mult la KabelBW ca sa ma conecteze. Odata ce conxiunea aia merge, renunt la Alice.

  3. [...] appointment had good timing because at the same day I have to be there because of the idiots from Alice, the Telekom techie has to come and set up the connection. There are only couple of days [...]

  4. Pete says:

    I really feel with you, and currently left Idiot4 behind me. I told the guy, that the assigned appointment with the technician is under no circumstances possible, he was completly unimpressed. “The technician will discover that you are not at home and contact us.” Splendid. You even can’t get an appointment, always 8am to 4pm. Crazy.

  5. Stefan says:

    Hi Pete, thanks for stopping by.

    The bad thing is, if the guy shows up and you’re not at home then they will charge you for the next appointment. It’s ridiculous.

    That being said, it does seem they come usually in the morning, between 8 and 11am.